The Fun Guy, the Sex Guy, and the Values Guy

I think the term “compatibility” is a pretty dry way to describe how you connect with someone and how you get along with someone. Maybe “meshability” or “synergism” would be better. They sound at least a little sexier. Maybe even “enfoldment”. But “compatibility” just makes me think of laptop charger plug compatibility when I travel overseas - mechanical, boring, a necessity.

Over time, I’ve realized that for me, compatibility comes in three forms: sex, fun, and values. For a guy to make it in a relationship with me, he has to be compatible in all three ways. But finding someone who is compatible in all three ways is really hard! Hence, you are here, reading these words.

Somehow, I’ve ended up at the center of a storm of perfect singular examples of compatibility right now. Cali Cool Guy is the fun guy - we can talk for hours, I never watch the clock when I’m with him, I know I could spend days with him and never get bored.

When he got his one-way ticket to CA for two weeks “or so”, I panicked and set up a date with Schlomo, textbook sex compatible. He’s Israeli (not sure what it is about the Israelis but I’ve been having some luck with them and sex compatibility recently). He was aggressive but respectful, pushed the envelope, very touchy feely and made it clear he wanted to go home with me. He flipped a switch on that Skye had not. I’ve been horny all week thinking about him, even if I don’t see anything long term.

Then today, I met Eli. We had that core foundation, that base to build on - also from Brooklyn, skis and hikes, has a dog, and shows responsibility without being rigid and tied down. Confident but quiet. I’ll be honest, I was bored out of my mind. I want to see him again, because we have so much in common and he was a good dude when he opened up. I immediately saw that I could go far with him if I could get into him.

Each one represents a totally different type of option and frankly, I want all three in one person. It’s hard! So I don’t know if it works to wait for all three or not, but I’m not giving up on any of these guys right now. At least not yet. A girl deserves all the compatibility she can get.